23 Tweets About Being On Dating Apps That Will Make You Laugh, Then Cry

What if everyone's tombstone was just what was on their Tinder profile?

Here lies
Megan, 29
Not looking for a hookup

— Brent Black (@brentalfloss) July 10, 2016

tinder but to meet guys willing to share their hbo go password

— Anna Fitzpatrick (@bananafitz) March 7, 2017

me getting a match on tinder vs. me getting a message pic.twitter.com/a99jM1Pnhd

— weed and disappointment (@ehjovan) April 17, 2018

Did you know that tinder deletes your account if you don't mention you like hiking or dogs in your bio

— Siri (@sirisantor) January 17, 2018

*finds soulmate*
*swipes left in hopes of finding a hotter soulmate*

— DaddyJew (@DaddyJew) January 21, 2015

Everyone tinder with a tough mudder pic just looks like they are very proud of themselves for rolling in diarrhea.

— Ariel Dumas (@ArielDumas) January 24, 2017

Tinder is actually an extremely good app because it makes me so tired of men that I actually don't want to date one

— Will Kellogg (@Will_Kellogg) April 16, 2018

i just saw that starbucks started selling a blonde flat white, which coincidentally is also my tinder bio

— erin archbold (@erinarchbold) January 21, 2018

help a boy on tinder just said he’s going hiking and for some reason I replied “oh fun, where do you go around here?” and now he thinks I enjoy hiking

— Danny Nett (@dannynett) April 8, 2018

Thinking of becoming one of those guys who puts a picture of them with someone else's kid in their Tinder profile & includes an explanation of whose kid it is instead of just taking a new pic that doesn't have a random little kid

— Hot Take Appreciator (@IHateNYT) February 21, 2018

I keep this photo saved on my phone for whenever guys from a Tinder ask me to send them a nude. pic.twitter.com/Q3WSTOmWGD

— Sarah Mirk (@sarahmirk) March 3, 2017

just re-downloaded tinder because I wanted to meet someone who's fluent in sarcasm

— chris payne (@cpayneonaplane) February 23, 2018

haven’t opened tinder for a bit and thought to myself “well they’ve probably restocked their inventory” modern dating is hell

— Brandy Jensen (@BrandyLJensen) April 15, 2018

I made a Tinder Bingo game. pic.twitter.com/mvb4AmzoXT

— dream ghoul (@TheDreamGhoul) November 22, 2015

i don't understand ppl who set their tinder profile picture to a group pic like are u tryna get ur whole squad laid or summit

— levi jed murphy (@levijedmuxphy) January 11, 2017

instagram message requests or “i saw you on tinder and you definitely didn’t like me back but i’m gonna try just in case also here’s a picture of my dick”

— inés (@vanberkeI) April 17, 2018

i just had a guy on tinder ask me what my ethnicity is, what my height is, and what my weight is... either he’s really picky or he was looking to sell me somewhere

— arianna (@ariannayw) April 16, 2018

The couple met on Hinge, a dating app for people who think they're better than the hoi polloi on Tinder.

— NYTimes Vows (@NYTvows) March 30, 2016

TINDER DATE: So what's your sign?

ME: can you please explain the Russia thing to me in plain English I feel so dumb all the time

— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) March 2, 2017

a tinder love story:

we match
i don’t message them
they don’t message me

the end.

— mog (@megangdbeer) April 11, 2018

How’s your dating life going? Today the only man who liked me on Hinge had 4 photos of his pet squirrel on his profile so that’s how mine’s going

— randy (@candlepeppers) February 26, 2018

Suddenly, after passing over several people on Hinge because of the shape of their sunglasses, I understand why my mom says I'm too picky.

— Heather Schmelzlen (@anchorlines) January 16, 2014

maybe in 2018 i’ll actually message my tinder matches instead of collecting them like pokemon cards

— ivan (@Ivanibr) January 2, 2018