Note: The following article contains content that some readers may find distressing.
Chrissy Teigen has opened up about losing her third child with John Legend, and why she shared photos of those difficult moments.
Earlier this month, the star revealed the tragic news on social media, which came after Chrissy experienced complications with her placenta, leading to her being hospitalised and undergoing blood transfusions to help keep her and the baby, Jack, strong.
In an emotional new essay on Medium, Chrissy candidly wrote about the experience, recalling: "After a couple nights at the hospital, my doctor told me exactly what I knew was coming – it was time to say goodbye. He just wouldn't survive this, and if it went on any longer, I might not either.
"We had tried bags and bags of blood transfusions, every single one going right through me like we hadn't done anything at all. Late one night, I was told it would be time to let go in the morning.
"I cried a little at first, then went into full blown convulsions of snot and tears, my breath not able to catch up with my own incredibly deep sadness. Even as I write this now, I can feel the pain all over again. Oxygen was placed over my nose and mouth, and that was the first picture you saw. Utter and complete sadness."
Revealing why she shared the photos on social media, Chrissy explained: "I had asked my mom and John to take pictures, no matter how uncomfortable it was. I explained to a very hesitant John that I needed them, and that I did NOT want to have to ever ask. That he just had to do it.
"He hated it. I could tell. It didn't make sense to him at the time. But I knew I needed to know of this moment forever, the same way I needed to remember us kissing at the end of the aisle, the same way I needed to remember our tears of joy after Luna and Miles. And I absolutely knew I needed to share this story.
"I cannot express how little I care that you hate the photos," she continued. "How little I care that it's something you wouldn't have done.
"I lived it, I chose to do it, and more than anything, these photos aren’t for anyone but the people who have lived this or are curious enough to wonder what something like this is like. These photos are only for the people who need them. The thoughts of others do not matter to me."
Chrissy went on to admit that "an experience like this creates a hole in your heart", while also thanking people for the kindness that the have showed her.
"I wrote this because I knew for me I needed to say something before I could move on from this and return back to life, so I truly thank you for allowing me to do so," she added.
"Jack will always be loved, explained to our kids as existing in the wind and trees and the butterflies they see. Thank you so much to every single person who has had us in their thoughts or gone as far as to send us your love and stories. We are so incredibly lucky."
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