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Dad Pens Hilarious Family Dog Contract Before Authorising Pooch Purchase

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When his children made repeated demands for a pet dog, this dad was determined that there would be strings attached.

He penned an in-depth contract detailing the many rules they would be expected to adhere to should their dream of dog ownership become a reality - and let the rest of the world in on the joke via Reddit.

He kicked off with the big guns, saying: “Dad never has to pick up dog poop. Ever.”

Other key items on the list included the size of the dog (“very small”), its diet (no organic or gourmet treats - “plain old dog food is fine”) and its backyard toileting (“rocks against Barbara’s fence” only).

It also established that Dad “never” has to give the dog a bath - but if he finds it a bit on the smelly side, a kid is required to do so within 24-hours.

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Barking mad: The Family Dog Contract in full (Reddit)

Dad also makes clear that the dog will never be referred to as a child or sibling - “all parties agree that the dog is a dog” - and, should it feature on the family Christmas card, this will be incidental: “the dog will not be the primary subject of a photo”.

Finally, Dad ends with a hardline thirteenth point: “The kids promise to never fall out of love with the dog or get bored of it. All parties agree that the dog is primarily the kids’ responsibility for its entire life.”

Once all children agreed to these terms and signed away their rights to a future of refusing to pick up poo, the pooch purchase of was finalised.

Rjohnstone13 informed his fellow Reddit-users: “Two weeks after contract was signed, we got a three year old white fluffy mutt from a shelter that weighs 15 lbs, was already housetrained and doesn’t shed or drool.

"We named him Kershaw (veto power not exercised). It’s been two years, and the kids (now ages 12, 13 and 15) have been pretty good about doing everything.

"Kershaw eats dry dog food from Trader Joe’s, and so far hasn’t created any indoor messes that have required the use of harmful cleaning chemicals. Everyone (including Dad) adores the dog, which has been a fantastic addition to (though not member of) our family.”

Top image: Imgur