I'm still alive because of her: Singapore bone marrow recipient
Stacey Lim was just 36 years old when she was told she had months to live.
She was your typical "anxious working mother in the rat race", working full days as an area sales manager and casting her eye on "an endless list of wants to achieve".
"Most of the time, I would think about work, how to manage my time between work, kids and myself," she said in a recent email interview, adding that apart from the occasional stressful situation, she was mostly happy.
It was on an average day in October 2009 while Lim was at work that she found herself feeling unnaturally breathless.
"It was not normal. I felt very, very, very tired, but I thought it was due to work," she said, adding that she then checked herself into hospital for a blood test, where she was admitted for severely low blood count.
Just a day later, she was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukaemia (ALL), a cancer of the white blood cells multiplying excessively in the her bone marrow. Known to be associated with exposure to radiation and chemicals in animals and humans, ALL crowds out normal cells in the bone marrow, spreading to other organs and causing death in a matter of weeks if untreated.
Lim's only lifeline: a bone marrow transplant, and doctors told her she had a 1 in 20,000 chance of finding a match, much less, possibly, a willing donor in Singapore — not the kind of news a married woman with two children not yet into their teenage years would find easy to stomach.
She was immediately warded at hospital after the diagnosis. "I was cut off from most people as I had to be isolated, due to my (weak) immune system," she said, adding that she only saw her husband once a day, and her children twice a week. "As much as I would have liked to be there for them, I couldn't."
Enter 24-year-old Stella Chua, a staff nurse, who signed herself up for Singapore's Bone Marrow Donor Programme (BMDP) in May that year, while still studying at the National University of Singapore.
"My mum is a regular blood donor and I followed in her 'footsteps'," she said, adding that she followed her mother to a donation drive at a community centre near their home, and came to know of the BMDP.
Six months later, she received a call, and was told that she was potentially a suitable donor for a patient in need of her stem cells.
"I was really surprised by the news, and was really elated," she shared. She did not know who she would be donating her stem cells to, but it did not matter. "All I knew was there was someone who needed my stem cells to re-live a new life," she added.
When Lim first heard word that a match had been found, she said she was delighted, but at the same time "hoping for the best, (and) prepared for the worst", because a previous potential donor ended up having hepatitis.
All went smoothly, though, and Chua's stem cells were successfully harvested for Lim, and her leukemia went into remission.
For the past nearly four years, Chua said she knew nothing of her beneficiary, apart from a gift of appreciation that she received from Lim, and the occasional update from the BMDP coordinator on her condition. It was only "a few months ago" that she was told about Lim, she said, and the two met for the first time at a reunion party for cancer survivors.
"Words cannot express (my gratefulness) for her selfless act," said Lim. "Maybe to her it's just a donation, but to me — not only me, but my family — we feel so indebted, because it's a new lease of life (for me). I'm still alive because of her."
Speaking of her donation, Chua said her experience helped greatly in her line of work, in particular the two years she spent stationed in a hematology ward, after previously being placed in oncology.
"My experience as a bone marrow donor allows me to empathise with this group of patients; the 'bone ache' they experienced when receiving the stimulating hormone factor injection like what I had before the harvesting," she said. "I understand the procedure of donating stem cells and can share this experience with patients' siblings, who experience anxiety before harvesting, pre-empting and reassuring them."
Her interest in looking after cancer patients spurred her to pursue an advanced diploma in nursing with a specialisation in oncology full-time, with the support of her employer.
"Nursing cancer patients is challenging and yet very satisfying," she said. "I learnt a lot from them and their family about life and about dying."
Stacey's and Stella's story was brought to you in partnership with the Singaporean of the Day project, and in cooperation with the Bone Marrow Donor Programme. To find out more about becoming a bone marrow donor, click here. To see more Singaporean of the Day stories, click here.
