John Oliver Mocks Long List of Possible Trump Appointments: ‘Like an Advent Calendar Where Every Circle’ Contains ‘Literal S–t’

Andi Ortiz
·2-min read

As Donald Trump prepares to enter the White House again in January, he’s currently figuring out who his second-term cabinet will include. And, looking at the list of possibilities on Sunday night, “Last Week Tonight” host John Oliver wasn’t impressed.

Referring to a chart drawn up by CNN, which showed at least three people in the running for multiple positions, Oliver opted to “state the obvious” before actually digging in on each of the possible contenders.

“That chart f–king sucks,” Oliver said. “It looks like a ‘choose your fighter’ screen where the only thing they’re fighting is the arc of the moral universe. It looks like an advent calendar where every circle opens up to a tiny piece of literal s–t. It looks like a game board for ‘Guess Who? Oops! All Assholes.’ There is a lot in there.”

The host then zeroed in on Elon Musk and RFK Jr., who were included on the chart, but had question marks placed above their head.

“Like even the chart is surprised that they’re there, and honestly, chart? Same,” Oliver joked.

According to reports, Musk’s job might be to make spending cuts, and he has promised to eliminate $2 trillion of spending — something experts have pointed out that you couldn’t do even if you fired literally everyone working for the federal government. To do so, Musk says Americans need to brace for “temporary hardship.”

“Seeing a man worth $300 billion telling the country to ‘endure hardship’ and ‘live within their means’ fills me with a feeling that, apparently, I cannot say out loud, for legal reasons,” Oliver shot back.

Oliver also highlighted Trump’s potential Attorney General picks — which include Texas AG Ken Paxton, who was under investigation for bribery in office, spoke at Trump’s rally on January 6, and more — and Trump’s potential CIA director Kash Patel, who literally wrote children’s books depicting Trump as an embattled king, who needs the help of a wizard…named Kash.

Apparently, Patel’s name has been floated for the job before, during Trump’s first administration, earning this response from Bill Barr at the time “over my dead body.”

“But that is just scratching the surface of the deep bench of idiots, freaks and and wannabe tough guys eager to get into the White House and start breaking things,” Oliver warned. “In January, things could get very bad, very fast.”

“Last Week Tonight with John Oliver” airs Sundays at 11 p.m. ET on HBO.

The post John Oliver Mocks Long List of Possible Trump Appointments: ‘Like an Advent Calendar Where Every Circle’ Contains ‘Literal S–t’ appeared first on TheWrap.

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