This Person Asked If They Were Wrong For Buying A Cake That A Child Behind Them Wanted, And Whew, People Have Thoughts

If you're here, you're probably familiar with the famous "Am I The Asshole?" subreddit.

If not, it's a place for people to come and get opinions on their behavior in certain situations.

Well, I recently came across one where someone bought a cake that the kid behind them in line wanted — which started a huuuuuuge debate in the comments. Here's what happened exactly:

"My pregnant wife (our first!) messaged me at the end of my work shift that she had sudden cravings for cake, and I was more than happy to get her one. Unfortunately, as this was close to 6 p.m., the bakery only had a Swiss roll left in terms of cake."

sliced cake
Shaiith / Getty Images

"As I was selecting a few other breads, a mother and her daughter came in, and the girl noticed the Swiss roll in the display cabinet and shouted that she wanted it. However, I had already ordered it, and when the worker took it out for me, the girl started screaming and crying. The mother did initially ask if I could leave the roll for her, but I said that I ordered first. She then began getting extremely demanding, saying I didn't need to eat it, saying I should feel for a kid and was selfish, etc. The shouting only stopped when the worker said I had come first and ordered it before the mother and daughter had even walked in."

pregnant person confronting a person the person in front of them in line
Bernardbodo / Getty Images

"I got home and told my wife about the incident. She said that I was a bit of an asshole for not giving up the cake for the kid and that she would have understood if the store had no more since I did buy other sweet bread or that I could have gone to the supermarket instead. She also asked why I didn't tell the mother I was buying it for a pregnant wife with cravings. I didn't see the need to share private info, but my wife said that maybe the mother would have understood and that I appeared insensitive by sticking to 'ordering first' as my argument."

couple having an argument on the couch
Dragos Condrea / Getty Images

"We did end up enjoying the Swiss roll, and she told me not to worry and just be more mindful next time, but I can't help but feel a bit guilty. Was I the asshole for denying a kid a cake she wanted?"

People responded in a bunch of different ways. Some said, yes, YTA (you're the A-hole), NTA (not the A-hole), ESH (everyone sucks here), and NAH (no A-hole here).

For the most part, it looks like people thought they were justified in saying no.

"You were getting your pregnant wife something for a craving. I can tell you that I did a ton of driving and impromptu runs during both pregnancies when my wife had cravings. I did it because I wanted to and knew it would make her happy. I may be being petty here.....but your wife is kind of an AH for calling you 'kind of an AH' when you were making a run for her. It isn't like you were nasty to the kid or anything like that."


"This stuff pisses me off. What are you teaching your child with this kind of behavior? That they can always have what they want and are so special they can deprive someone else of it even if they got their first? If you wanted to, you would, but if you don't…well, it's life, isn't it? We don't always get what we want. The mother's reaction is very telling about why the child behaves that way…."


"Depending on how young or neurodivergent the girl is, she should know how to behave. Her mother was TA for demanding you to give it to them and getting riled up. I can understand where your wife was coming from, but the mother's behavior is inexcusable and incredibly rude. That was your cake and your choice of what you did with it. She should have respected that."


person shrugging
Meeko Media / Getty Images

But then, some thought the person should have given up the cake.

"You had every right to continue buying the Swiss Roll, but unless you have a particular liking for them or this store is much better than other places, I would also have considered getting something else. That said, I also see nothing wrong with explaining. I think your wife has a good overall approach."


"ESH, kinda. Mom was out of line for trying to guilt OP, but I'd have let the kid have the cake."


person giving a thumbs down
Andrii Iemelyanenko / Getty Images

They also thought "ordering first" was a poor excuse to tell the mom.

"YTAH for not saying it was for your pregnant wife and instead stating that 'you ordered first.'"


"Yeah, for not telling the mom it's for your pregnant wife."


I personally think the parent could have explained that the cake was taken and offered the kid another option. The behavior they exhibited toward the writer feels entitled and sets a bad example for their child. But what do you all think? Were they in the wrong? Would you have given up the cake? Tell me in the comments below.

Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.