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What is ‘THE Box’? Some creators say it should never be touched: ‘My box is traumatic’
Several content creators are showcasing a widely used vessel to store mementos from past relationships: “The Box.”
On July 18, 19-year-old Priya (@priarmour) of Houston took to the digital platform to share her box, which she’s “convinced every girl” is familiar with — in one respect or another.
“The Box” is pretty self-explanatory: It’s the designated vessel, like a shoebox, that women use to house meaningful items from their relationship. Those who have a box typically begin storing mementos in it while still in the relationship. By the time they’ve broken up with their significant other, they’ve curated a bittersweet collection of things in their box.
“On the positive side, these items can serve as reminders of good times and valuable life lessons learned,” Kalley Hartman, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Newport Beach, Calif., tells In The Know by Yahoo. “They can represent a part of your identity and personal growth. For example, a gift from an ex-partner might remind you of a time when you felt loved or appreciated, or a letter might reflect how you’ve grown since then.”
There are, however, potential setbacks to keeping these items post-relationship.
“Holding onto these items can sometimes prevent you from fully moving on, especially if they’re associated with painful memories or feelings,” Hartman says. “They can keep you stuck in the past and hinder your ability to embrace the present or future. If seeing these items brings up negative emotions such as sadness, anger, or regret, it might be a sign that they’re more harmful than beneficial.”
Disposing of meaningful items, while difficult, may play an integral role in helping you move on from a failed relationship. Continuing to store keepsakes after breaking up can potentially halt your ability to heal from the situation.
“Some people struggle with letting go of such items because they symbolize a significant relationship or period in their lives,” Hartman adds. “Letting go can feel like losing a piece of their identity or history. It’s important to remember, though, that while these items may represent past experiences, they don’t define you.”
An excerpt from a 2016 article from The Cut further corroborates Hartman’s assertions.
“These are the hardest to throw out, but also the least practical to save in the long term. Studies show that the longer you make physical contact with something, the more attached you become, so do the first round of purging as soon as you can and let go of the idea of saving every last piece of memorabilia,” reveals The Cut. “Creating a personal museum of your former relationship isn’t healthy — you run the risk of getting frozen in time, impairing your ability to move on.”
‘We don’t touch the box’
It seems Priya’s video, which has more than 3.3 million views and 630,800 likes since posting, has reached its targeted audience. Fellow creators who are familiar with the box and have their own as well have taken to her comments to discuss the essentiality of never looking in it.
“I TOSSED MINE. every letter, drawing, etc. I kept reading them so much it made me sick. it had to go and i never looked back,” @abrianna.fulcher revealed.
“No bc no one has been sweet enough to give me a reason for a box,” @user632950630 wrote, to which Priya replied, “my box is traumatic.”
“We don’t touch the box,” @828.zozoo declared.
“And the rule is to never look at what’s in it,” she added in her caption.
Some creators, however, are more daring than others.
On July 1, Phoebe (@1x.phoebe_xx) went through the contents of her own “memory box” and unearthed a stone her ex had decorated for her.
On June 28, a creator who goes by the username @star.bugs11 revealed the contents of her box, which includes bracelets, a pendant and purple sunglasses.
“We broke up but i still have most of the stuff he gave me,” they write.
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