Robert Downey Jr.’s Wife Susan Says 'I Would Never Be Who I Am Without Him in My Life'

The Oscar winner's wife of 18 years is just as smitten with him as he is with her

<p>Carlo Paloni/BAFTA via Getty</p> Robert Downey Jr. and Susan Downey at the EE BAFTA Film Awards 2024

Carlo Paloni/BAFTA via Getty

Robert Downey Jr. and Susan Downey at the EE BAFTA Film Awards 2024

It’s no secret that Robert Downey Jr. is absolutely smitten with his wife, but now Susan Downey is getting in on the action.

During the actor’s impressive awards season run this year, he lovingly called out his wife of close to 20 years, including his Oscar’s acceptance speech in which he declared, “You loved me back to life.”

In Esquire's spring 2024 issue, Susan, 50, introduced a new perspective to the couple’s beloved story. “Everybody loves the simple narrative of somehow I came in and turned his life around and blah, blah, blah. But I can tell you that I would never be who I am without him in my life.”

She continued of Robert, 59, who she married in 2005, “His trajectory is just the easier one to chart because he’s had to live his ups and downs in public. When we met, we were fortunate that he was in a place where he was open to do things differently than he had historically. But you know what? So was I.”

The Oppenheimer star similarly raved to the outlet about his wife, who he met on the set of Gothika in 2003.

“It’s beyond us being two humans who cohabitate and have built a life together. There’s something about her that remains almost entirely a mystery,” he shared. “I still — I’ll see her across the kitchen and study her as though I’m a private investigator.”

Related: Robert Downey Jr. Juggled Oscars Weekend with His Kids’ Ball Games: ‘Both Starting Pitchers’ (Exclusive)

<p>Norman Jean Roy</p> Robert Downey Jr for Esquire

Norman Jean Roy

Robert Downey Jr for Esquire

The couple previously opened up to PEOPLE about their 18-year marriage, sharing that one of the secrets to their longevity comes in the form of a two-week rule.

“We do have a two-week rule, which often feels too long, but we don't go more than two weeks without seeing each other and the family being together,” Susan said, referring to herself and Robert and their kids: son Exton, 12, and daughter Avri, 9, as well as Robert’s son Indio, 30, from a previous marriage. “Fortunately, we prefer to be a traveling circus when we can be.”

Robert said that family life “just gives me, honestly, something to attach my neurosis to that's positive,” before his wife continued to praise his skills as a father and husband.

“We say he's the perfect date because he's incredibly punctual and he makes sure that we are,” Susan shared of the actor’s dedication to sharing meals as a family every night. “We always make fun of him about that, but I think that’s his way of saying, ‘I’m here. Let’s be together, let’s spend some time.’ Let's stop everything and just talk and share."

Related: Robert Downey Jr. Reflects on His Hollywood Journey After Oscar Win: 'There Are Ways to Heal' (Exclusive)

<p>Rodin Eckenroth/GA/The Hollywood Reporter via Getty</p> Susan Downey and Robert Downey Jr. attend the 3rd Annual Academy Museum Gala at Academy Museum of Motion Pictures on December 03, 2023

Rodin Eckenroth/GA/The Hollywood Reporter via Getty

Susan Downey and Robert Downey Jr. attend the 3rd Annual Academy Museum Gala at Academy Museum of Motion Pictures on December 03, 2023

Susan, who's Robert's producing partner at their company, Team Downey, also praised the Iron Man star for being "the source of humor and wit and joy" in their home — and she loves seeing that rub off on their kids.

“I see that coming out in my kids and I know where it's coming from. And it's just a very happy, very creative environment, and I believe he fosters it.”

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She didn’t forget to mention his acting chops, either.

“He approaches everything he's done, every Marvel movie, every other movie, with the same level of commitment and belief that he is an actor and that he's doing his best to create a role,” she said.

“But sometimes I think it looks so effortless that it's just like, ‘Oh, yeah, that's just Downey being Downey,’ when it's like, ‘No, there's a lot of craft and skill that is going into the performance.’ ”

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