Common mistakes most Singaporean parents make
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What kind of parents are Singaporeans? The Tiger Mum type or the “just-play-with-your-iPad-leave-me-alone” type?
No matter what type we are, there will always be some of us who make these common mistakes.
The reason I wrote this is not to shame Singapore parents, but to create an opportunity for us reflect on some of the extremes we go to in our quest to raise the perfect child.
Mistake #1: Being overly competitive
Being kiasu is in every Singaporean’s DNA. As parents, we tend to compare our kids to our peers’ children. Right from when they are newborns, we start comparing them with others.
Mistake #2: Raising the child we want, not the child we have
We all have an idea of the dream child that we would like to raise. Every parent would love to raise another Joseph Schooling or a gold medalist.
However, not every child is born to be a good sportsman. As parents, we tend to overlook our children’s strengths and obsess over their weaknesses, causing us to be bent on grooming and molding them to be dream child of our choice.
Mistake #3: Thinking that toys and activities can make up for quality time
Some parents buy so many toys for the children or sign them up for multiple enrichment classes. However, this is not the same as spending quality time with them.
Mistake #4: Being overprotective
You are a helicopter parent, planning every single route for your children and shoving him down a narrow path that you have charted out till he becomes an adult.
Everyone learns through experimentation, mistakes and failure, children included. If you do not let go to let them fall and pick themselves up, how will your child ever learn?
Mistake #5: Yelling
This is a mistake I am so guilty of. After a hard day at work, parents crave peace and quiet at home.
But the children still make a mess, which results in yelling. Looking back, instead of raising my voice, I could have use a softer approach to speak to my children in order to get things done.
Conclusion
No parent is perfect and we are as human as our children are. Now that you know these common mistakes parents make, share the list with your friends with children to help them be better parents.
Adrian Tan is a blogger who writes about entrepreneurship and human resource issues.
